It has always been a secret dream of mine to become an international spy. I can write about this without jeopardising the ambition, because my own inadequacies and shortfallings have already taken care of that.
Reasons I cannot be a spy.
1) I can keep other peoples secrets but not my own
2)I'm hopelessly clumsy
3) I have no sense of direction
4)My poker face consists of flared nostrils and and a squint
5) I'm frightened of melted ice cream and balloons so probably would not cope well with a national crisis and/or impending doom.
But tonight, oh glorious tonight, I will spend one blissful hour living out my fantasies, ably guided by the BBC. That's right. Spooks is returning to our screens. I have cancelled actual plans with actual people to be in attendance. I suggest you do the same.
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